For me it was a strange concept that your unconscious mind is not always looking out for your best interest. I've always trusted my instinct, I took pride in having a great instinct. ..Boy am I now wondering how many good things I have missed out on!

Cause what I've learned this year is that if something doesn't feel right.. that might be your unconscious trying to push you from unfamiliar things - that might be just what you always needed. Trying to get you to choose wrong again, choose the familiar, the issues you know, the unfinished business...

All your senses might try to convince you something is not right. You might be slightly put off by small things, lose your interest or even be scared to death. Cause changing your choices is scary, but damn if the scariest thing is never being able to significantly change your life for the better.

I was both courageous and lucky enough to be able to make a different choice. I pushed it away twice and got lucky the door opened again every time. I tested my choices and discussed them in therapy, I took preventive measures when I could but also jumped without a net at times. 

It definitely was not easy to choose what in the end proved to be the best for me. And that kind of shocked me. And that's why I wrote this article, to let you know - and to remind myself if needed - that at times you shouldn't trust your instinct. Trust yourself with being able to change.